MUST JESUS BEAR THE CROSS ALONE AND ALL THE WORLD GO FREE ?
MUST JESUS BEAR THE CROSS ALONE AND ALL THE WORLD GO FREE ? NO THERE’S A CROSS FOR EVERYONE AND THERE’S A CROSS FOR ME.
In the mid 90’s I heard Miles Monroe speak so passionately about life purpose and it moved me to want to know what the purpose for my life was. The next day I began to search for my purpose in life. What did God create me to be?
I can remember reading a book by Benny Hinn in 1995 and coming to the part of the book where it asked the question “Can you pay the price.” I remember so clearly after reading several testimonies and the many trials he had gone through, saying to myself NO I can’t pay the price. No I don’t want to do that knowing it would be hard. Well if you don’t know let me tell you that when God wants something out of your life, he is going to get it. You see I did not know it at that time, but soon after I would indeed began to carry my cross.
In 1998 I came down with a cold and it would not go away. So after many days/weeks had passed I sought medical help from my doctor, who three days later told me I was HIV positive. Well for those of you who have heard these words directed to you I don’t have to tell you what that sounds like coming from a doctor’s mouth. Yes I was a Christian at that time but there was nothing in me at that time that could’ve prepared me for those words that had just came out of that doctors mouth, so I thought. This information became the most devastating, life changing news of my life. For the next eight years I would indeed began to pay the price of my cross. I cannot tell you the many days I sat in a dark room wanting this cup to pass from me. At one time I wanted to take my own life. I know the only reason I did not take my own life was because I new that was the one sin God could not forgive, I know this for a fact. I went though my own personal HELL.
Today I educate others about this disease, the prevention and care. I also help facilitate local and regional women’s support groups. I consider myself to be a generous, compassionate person, and one who takes great pleasure and satisfaction in serving those less fortunate than me. I have a passion for educating people about HIV/AIDS, but particularly to young people and African-American women. I constantly say to those infected, “Live life to the fullest, keep yourself healthy mentally, spiritually and physically. If you are on medicine take it everyday and the way they have been prescribed to you. Medicine does extend your life”.
Just a little over a month ago I went on an Women’s Encounter with the women in my church. In the country hills of Lancaster Pennsylvania is where I truly embraced the meaning of the cross for my life. You see I had an opportunity to literally carry the cross of Christ on my back. As the tears poured out and rained down my face I found myself crying out Lord I gladly bear this cross. As I was carrying the cross I envisioned every one I had ever met who was HIV positive, those WHO had died, those alive, and even those whom I had yet to meet. It was in those few minutes when I knew this was the purpose of my birth to the nation. This is what the Lord had ordained for me. He allowed me to know that I was graced with everything I would need to do this work. My heart was for the people and I was no longer ashamed. For then I knew that ALL of my shame was indeed at the foot of the cross, all of my healing is there and all of my deliverance is there.
NO! CHRIST WILL NOT BEAR THE CROSS ALONE! I WILL GLADLY BEAR MY CROSS,
WILL YOU?
In the mid 90’s I heard Miles Monroe speak so passionately about life purpose and it moved me to want to know what the purpose for my life was. The next day I began to search for my purpose in life. What did God create me to be?
I can remember reading a book by Benny Hinn in 1995 and coming to the part of the book where it asked the question “Can you pay the price.” I remember so clearly after reading several testimonies and the many trials he had gone through, saying to myself NO I can’t pay the price. No I don’t want to do that knowing it would be hard. Well if you don’t know let me tell you that when God wants something out of your life, he is going to get it. You see I did not know it at that time, but soon after I would indeed began to carry my cross.
In 1998 I came down with a cold and it would not go away. So after many days/weeks had passed I sought medical help from my doctor, who three days later told me I was HIV positive. Well for those of you who have heard these words directed to you I don’t have to tell you what that sounds like coming from a doctor’s mouth. Yes I was a Christian at that time but there was nothing in me at that time that could’ve prepared me for those words that had just came out of that doctors mouth, so I thought. This information became the most devastating, life changing news of my life. For the next eight years I would indeed began to pay the price of my cross. I cannot tell you the many days I sat in a dark room wanting this cup to pass from me. At one time I wanted to take my own life. I know the only reason I did not take my own life was because I new that was the one sin God could not forgive, I know this for a fact. I went though my own personal HELL.
Today I educate others about this disease, the prevention and care. I also help facilitate local and regional women’s support groups. I consider myself to be a generous, compassionate person, and one who takes great pleasure and satisfaction in serving those less fortunate than me. I have a passion for educating people about HIV/AIDS, but particularly to young people and African-American women. I constantly say to those infected, “Live life to the fullest, keep yourself healthy mentally, spiritually and physically. If you are on medicine take it everyday and the way they have been prescribed to you. Medicine does extend your life”.
Just a little over a month ago I went on an Women’s Encounter with the women in my church. In the country hills of Lancaster Pennsylvania is where I truly embraced the meaning of the cross for my life. You see I had an opportunity to literally carry the cross of Christ on my back. As the tears poured out and rained down my face I found myself crying out Lord I gladly bear this cross. As I was carrying the cross I envisioned every one I had ever met who was HIV positive, those WHO had died, those alive, and even those whom I had yet to meet. It was in those few minutes when I knew this was the purpose of my birth to the nation. This is what the Lord had ordained for me. He allowed me to know that I was graced with everything I would need to do this work. My heart was for the people and I was no longer ashamed. For then I knew that ALL of my shame was indeed at the foot of the cross, all of my healing is there and all of my deliverance is there.
NO! CHRIST WILL NOT BEAR THE CROSS ALONE! I WILL GLADLY BEAR MY CROSS,
WILL YOU?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Dana Gerald on -
Your testimony is absolutely amazing. I am so happy that you have made Jesus Christ your choice!! It's such a wonderful thing to know him and to know that just as He will not bear His cross alone, he will not allow us to bear ours alone either. He promised never to leave us and I want you to know that your story has truly encouraged me!
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